Allow me to catch you up...

Let’s go Marty McFly. If you were to step in the Delorean and time travel back to the last few weeks in May, you would have found me in the final days of my first school year at Falalius Community School, caught up in the throws of graduation preparations. I would be practicing about ten local dances to perform with my students on the big day and brainstorming my speech (in Woleaian) to my four graduating 8th graders. If you asked me, I would have told you that I'd be arriving in Yap for In-Service Training II around the beginning of June and no, I have never seen a Cheeze-It on my island, thank you very much.

Oh, how little did I (do I ever?) know!? My last scheduled day of class was Friday, May 21st and on Thursday, May 20, I was all set to collect my students' final projects and not at all worried about calculating grades - after all, I'd have plenty of time before I would be leaving to schlog through grades. I was confident in this conviction because, if anywhere, it is on a tiny island in the middle of a big ocean that you should literally be able to see your means of transportation coming for miles.

Nope.

Not only was I blindsided with the news that I'd be leaving in less than a day on a patrol boat with none other than the President of the FSM, but this news was fantastically preceded by an honest-to-goodness boat-load of Cheeze-Its arriving on my island!

In one mad dash, I managed to finish my grades, pack, and ant-proof my mountains of food with enough time to catch the high school graduation on Falalop Friday morning. President Mani Mori’s address to the graduating seniors? “Don’t get married and be humble. Oh, and your island may be 60 ft. under water soon. Congratulations!”

Leaving Woleai on the 01 Patrol Boat was every second an adventure. Taking a little inflatable raft up to the boat, Porter was instructed to climb the ladder while Gita and I, the only females taking the trip, were hoisted aboard – whee! Then, within minutes, we were given mail – always a delightful treat – as we sailed passed the back side of Falalius. A number of my students were there waving us farewell with giant banana and coconut leaves. From a distance they reminded me of Tiny and her flippers flapping away to bid us farewell. The ship honked its horn and we were out to sea.

Now, normally going out to sea from Woleai entails many days of bland open ocean and crackers. This adventure, however, was marked by receiving fresh fruit and cold Fantas on the way to the W.C., pork and coconut crab for dinner, eggs and toast for breakfast. In the evening we chatted with President Mori about life in Woleai and climate change. We slept in cozy bunks in an air-conditioned room (thanks to our school area supervisor, Stan, essentially our boss, for insisting we kick him out!). On the quiet deck Porter and I spotted any number of creatures and beasts in the clouds as we had a soul-heartening conversation in the morning. Gita and I reverted to seventh grade girls as we giggled our way through New Moon in the afternoon. All the while, I shamelessly made friends with all the crew members so as to secure rides in the future – “hey, if you’re ever in this neck of the ocean again…” Yap appeared on the horizon and as wonderful as each moment was on the ship, it was made even better for how short the voyage was! We arrived Saturday evening, in little more than a single day's time. Needless to say, I loved every second of this adventure!

Being back on Yap, it's always delightful to spend time with the other PCVs and my host family here. My brothers are all doing well - they have finished their school year and Jimmy (aka Cobrino – I’m Cobrina) graduated from Yap SDA High School - we are all very proud of him. Summer time with my host family includes watching MANY movies, taking walks at dusk with Gita, and a little something I like to call Night Court, wherein I am the judge, the twins are attorneys, and any number of defendants, plaintiffs, and witnesses are on hand. In the last case we tried, Lin was charging his friend Nathan with the murder of his dog. Riveting.

The weekend before training began, the three of us Woleai Volunteers caught wind of a rumor about the Peace Corps closing our sites in Woleai. The new Program and Training Officer flew in from Pohnpei to meet with us and over pizza that Wednesday she dealt the blow. On account of recent developments, or rather deteriorations, in the “safety and security situation” in Woleai, we will not be allowed to return permanently to our sites barring a miracle. Basically, PMA, the airline that had a contractual agreement with the Peace Corps, has since rescinded their agreement in writing and can no longer guarantee to fly to Woleai of emergency on account of the state of the runway.

I now have one of the worst track records with the Peace Corps. Twice the Peace Corps has come to me saying it’s time to go back to Woleai and I said, in effect, “Well, what if I stay?” Now that I want to go back, wouldn’t you know it, the Peace Corps is saying to me, “nope, now you stay.” This has been a very challenging and dynamic change of circumstances. It’s difficult for me to wrap my brain around this decision and even harder for me to grapple with what my role in this whole situation is. I did not join the Peace Corps to be told that the answers to a key problem facing my community are out of my hands and not to push. “Emily, you’re not an engineer, let it go.” (Well, I’m not a teacher either, but here I am.)

Moving on.

So when it comes down to it, Porter, Gita and I have been cleared to return to Woleai to finish out the summer. We’re planning on leaving on the next ship, which has just been bumped back from the 18th to the end of June. We’ll have time to spend in our communities and try to bring about some sense of closure, however conflicted it may be. Then we shall pack up and leave Woleai on the next ship (August-ish). Our futures after that point are still around the bend, but the Peace Corps has allowed us to explore many options for ourselves. Right now I am exploring a couple possible placements both within the Ulithi Atoll and on Yap Proper.

At present, I am waiting to hear back from PC Pohnpei and very much in limbo as to my future as a PCV. Well, it is what it is and what will be will be good.

And with that in mind, thank you for all the support and goodness that I receive from you. I’ll be in touch soon, and in the meantime, drop me a line and let me know how you are – what is your life like and what goodness lies around the bend in your path?

See for yourself...

Some pictures from the last few months in Woleai...

Tiny!


Not so tiny any more!


She still likes to eat out of my hand, but she's getting too big to ride on my shoulder...so sad when your turtles grow up.


Where I go to watch the sunset.


There are many different kinds of sunsets...


Some are dynamic and awe-inspiring...


Some are purple and pink :-)...


Some are yellow...


Others are simply magnificent manifestations of light...


And some look rather like rubber duckies :-)


School Picnic (no, he's not a student...that's Santus)


School Picnic


Reunion with Gita in Woleai


High School Graduation


Sow-how in his first thu!


BIG FOOT...literally. Infection (cellulitus) - VERY unpleasant!! All better now.


Host mother and littlest brother (Yap) - gotta love 'em!

Opening up and Letting Go...

(Written mid-April...)

I have been back on Falalus for just over a week now but time seems to expand here, so it has felt much longer (maybe it’s because being on the ship for a week seems to suck up time!). Plus, things are going well. One of the biggest differences for me here so far (other than not being miserable with a resident parasite in my gut) is that I’m following my dear, wise friend Barbara’s advice to be an ‘observer,’ which she said means letting go of the outcome. To me this means simply being present (which is made ever so much easier on an island where there really isn’t much choice!). It also means not letting what might/could/should/may/can be to crush or stifle what is.

And so I’m trying to let go. I’m trying to let go of the outcomes of this whole ‘Peace Corps Experience.’ I’m especially trying to let go of the outcomes of these next 2-3 months before the next training. Shoot, I’m even trying to let go of how my island cooking concoctions turn out! (To date, the tahini-less hummus was fabulous, the corn meal mush was satisfactory, and the polenta scrumptious.)

Of course, the task of letting go might be made much easier with some divine stroke of clarity or omniscience as to how the present will unfold and expand into the future. But then again, there’s something to be said for the Bend in the Road and all that lies beyond. Leaves plenty scope for the imagination, as my dear friend Anne Shirley would say. Besides, I’m finding that sometimes consciously letting go can be easier than unconsciously holding on. Some eggs can crack themselves if we let them ;-P

Each evening at sunset I have been heading to the ‘end of the island’ to ‘checkii yaai phone,’ or check my new satellite phone for messages (which works wonderfully so far! THANK YOU to everyone who has sent me messages so far, it really does make me feel connected and I’m sending you positive energy back!). Faalimaase, the name of where I go, is on the western side of the island. Everyone else thinks it’s haunted, so I pretty much get it to myself, which is a rare occurrence on this highly communal island. Being alone and in such an idyllic setting, I am able to have a daily check-in – with my friends/family via satphone, with my body via yoga, and with my heart via meditation. As I arose from a savassana the other day, I simply had to laugh at how surreal it is to find myself where I am! It’s moments like these that help me sink into the present.

Speaking of sinking, the island might be sinking – the beach is much steeper and narrower than before – or it might just be seasonal. Whatever the case, it makes it easier for me to run in the morning while it’s still dark (I have to run then when no one can see me) because there’s now a clear path at the top of the beach. (Special thanks to Uncle Tim for the great headlamp that a.) stays in place and b.) has great range so I don’t end up running into a coconut tree )

In my time on Yap I received a flabbergasting outpouring of support and supplies, and I can never be grateful enough! I have food galore, teaching resources, books, candles, yarn, you name it! I even have three choices of water filtration systems to choose from to help me stay healthy (plus lots of traditional and modern remedies). The water filter I’m using now is just about the coolest thing ever – it’s called the SteriPen (and comes from Blue Hill, Maine of all places!). It’s basically a UV light wand that I use to stir the water for about a minute and it takes care of all the germies! Neato!

My language skills continue to improve bit by bit, and the kids are learning English bit by bit. For instance, some of the kids now say ‘hi,’ which is something I had to teach them (there’s no greeting in this language other than “buutogo mwongoo,” or “come eat”). Anyway, it may seem small, but it’s good for my soul. I need to be careful, though, because I today I somehow found myself in the thick of an all-out discussion of all the English swear words my 7th and 8th graders know (and I may have unintentionally taught them some, I’m not gonna lie). Here’s how it went down. I began the class with a warm-up activity explaining the important difference between the letters P and B (thanks to PCV Mike for the example). Take, for instance, the following sentences – “I eat crab” and “I eat crap.” One letter makes a big difference in what you say, but most of the kids have trouble pronouncing the difference. In order for this example to really hit home, however, the kids needed to know what ‘crap’ meant…which led to a discussion of how “poop” was the good way to say it, “crap” was in the middle of the field, and “sh*t” was at the bottom of the ladder. This little discussion snowballed and soon I found myself throwing out all propriety and cultural norms in a full-steam-ahead discussion of “kepate ngawe,” or bad words. We covered everything from expletives and derogative terms for women to racial slurs and sexuality. Oy vey! I did my best to maintain a thread of integrity and pushed the importance of understanding and comprehending the words you use so as to not hurt people intentionally or unintentionally. One of the best/most awkward parts was that my principal/co-teacher walked into the classroom late in the heat of the discussion. He looked at the board, I sputtered out some explanation/apology, saying that maybe this wasn’t the best lesson for us to team-teach, and he left before even sitting down! It was one of those classic moments and I hope my students appreciated it as much as I did :-)

And with that yarn, it’s time I wrapped this update up. Thank you, as ever, for your love and support.

Whee! Emily

PS – Tiny is ever so much bigger than I expected, but she still likes to ride on my shoulder :-) She sends her love, too!

There again

Hi, this is Emily's Mom letting you know that, after a five day boat trip and a day's visit with Porter and Gita, Emily made it back to Falalus (on April 8.) She spent at least two days unpacking and wants to thank everybody for the amazing gifts and communication and support you gave her. Special thanks to those who have already emailed her SAT phone. Emily can't use her phone to respond (we'll have to wait for her letters) but she loves hearing from you.

Back to Falalus

Just a quick note to say that I'm off again to Woleai, healthy, hearty, and happy. Talk to you all in 2-3 months! WHEE, emily

It's like they knew...

This blog post goes out to my wonderful parents, whose support is ample and just so darn well timed. We are in the midst of Tropical Depression 02-W, soon to be upgraded to a tropical storm, and to boot, I have a nasty head cold. (Which seems to be the trend, actually - the two times I've been sick on Yap we've had tropical storms, so I'll take the blame. Sorry, Yap). Anywho, wouldn't you know it, with it storming outside and me feeling like my head's in a cloud, I got a package from the folks yesterday with chocolate, soup, and movies. As my friend Laura said, it's like they knew! ('Cause they do, 'cause they're great like that and I love 'em.)

In other news, I've been thoroughly enjoying my time here on Yap as it's coming to a close. The ship is announced to set sail on April 2nd (mind you, transportation dates in Yap are never set in stone...even stone money...haha, bad joke...I'll blame it on the sinuses interfering w/ the normal pathways of wit and genius in my brilliant brain...except not quite). So I've got a couple of more weeks to prepare myself for heading back out to Falalus and reuniting w/ my baby turtle, students, and community. It'll be good.

Aside from the present head cold (darn my Wellness Formula being on Falalus!), I'm very happy to report that I feel hearty, healthy, and happy. This time I've had here on Yap has been a blessing in many ways that just keep unfolding. As always, I am ever grateful for your support and friendship.

Gai sa gashigeshige gemaase, remaweshe!
Cobrina LeHasugulmal
aka emily :-)


PS - a huge and hearty congratulations to Lo and her St. Patty's Day Baby! Yay!

Imagine...

*Habele. I have received many requests from friends and family on how they can support my work as a teacher here in the Outer Islands of Yap. Check out these websites for Habele, an organization striving to provide Outer Island students with educational opportunities.
http://www.habele.org/
http://habele.blogspot.com/2009/04/outer-island-micronesian-students-hard.html (this has a good summary of their work)
http://habele.blogspot.com/


*Tsunami. Yap Day 2010 Celebrations were on March 1st and 2nd. The day before, us PCVs received a warning that a tsunami was going to try to crash the party, which is the biggest cultural to-do here on the island (lots of local foods, dance, and dress). But what with all the prayers and support from family and friends heading our way, I guess the tsunami realized that it really wasn't on the guest list. Thank you for your concern and support.

*Potholes. Driving to work in America, day in day out, one comes to know the road traversed with its few rough patches and occasional potholes. Here in Yap, one comes to know the occasional smooth parts of the road otherwise bedecked by the ubiquitous expanses of potholes.

*Public Transportation. Here in Yap, you don't get stuck behind school buses. They get stuck behind you, speeding and veering into the other lane to pass in a very un-Micronesian hurry. (I'm glad I don't have to take the bus.)

*Chef Boyardee. When I first came to Yap, I was worried about my diet suffering from my "favorite canned meat." Now, I love Chef Boyardee and it's enriched noodles. Let's just say I've been flexible and come a long way from my vegetarianism and Royal River Natural Foods. Damn, I had it good.

*Nature vs. Nissan. When I was in America, I used to feel exposed to the elements when driving through heavy rain in a car (even in my trusty Buick Buelah who never steered me wrong). Now, I feel more 'battened down,' so to say, in a car than most anywhere else (esp. my host father's Nissan company truck). Most life is conducted outside here, and even the inside feels outside in many regards. Ants, slat windows, humidity. It's just interesting to consider how much our modern 'amenities,' like cars and windows, separate us from the natural world. Here, whether we like it or not, the natural world is going to have its way, so we have things that crawl, unsealed windows, and fuzzy layers of mold on things. But we also know our food comes from the land we work and the sun rises and sets over the water that defines our island life. That's not something we want to keep out. Ants? Maybe. But feeling connected to the natural world? Nope.

*Peanuts. My host brother Lindsey was reading a story problem from his math book about a girl eating peanuts at a baseball game. I started to tell him how cool it was to eat peanuts at a baseball game 'cause you can throw the shells on the ground. I caught myself, though, because I realized that what was novel or cool about this to me is just run of the mill for Lindsey. We throw food on the ground all the time here. Our 'kitchen' and 'dining room' are outside under a tin 'beranta' and the ground is our floor. Our trash compactors and vacuums are covered in fur and have four legs. Lindsey wanted me to finish what I was saying, so I struggled to explain that in America, where we cook and eat are inside, so we don't go around throwing or spitting fishbones on the floor. Weird.


In other, much less pleasant news, I made the discovery this weekend that I have intestinal worm(s). It's nothing serious and I am experiencing no symptoms, but I'm still taking the necessary medicine and going to get some bloodwork done to be sure.

In other, much MORE pleasant news, fellow Yapese PCVs Laura, Kanani, and I had a thoroughly delightful belated birthday celebration for Laura this weekend where nothing seemed to work out the way we planned and it was all for the better.

I'm not sure when the next ship will leave, but I am very happy to be here now.

Gareteli gai sa gashigeshige gemaase (really, thank you all so very much) for your support and love.

Sa ila, remaweshe (bye bye, my dears) - Emily LeGasugulmal :-D

PS - THANK YOU so much for all the wonderful care packages. At this point, I have enough yummy and delectable supplies to last me for quite some time. So I'd like to respectfully alter my request for care packages to the simple gift of correspondence. Again, thanks everyone SO MUCH. (Of course, little things here and there will always be appreciated, but I've got a happy collection of goodies already. I can always use notes and letters connecting me to you - they never go bad and the rats don't eat them :-D! Peace and love, emily)